I think these are all the UK Football Grounds I have visited. Quite a sorry little list:
White Hart Lane, Tottenham Hotspur
Boleyn Ground, West Ham United
Goodison Park, Everton
The Dell, Southampton
The Hawthorns, West Bromwich Albion
City Ground, Nottingham Forest
Kassam Stadium, Oxford United
Wembley Stadium, England
Some Disney related facts for you this week…
1. Pinocchio is Italian for "pine head".
2. Mickey Mouse’s original name was Mortimer.
3. The password for the 1944 invasion at Normandy was "Mickey Mouse".
4. The first animated film to be nominated for an Oscar for best picture was Beauty and the Beast in 1991.
5. 1940 was the first year that Disney released two full length feature animations in the same year - Fantasia and Pinocchio.
6. Pocahontas was Disney’s first full length animation that was based on actual historic events.
7. In Fantasia, the sorcerer’s name is Yensid (Disney backwards).
8. The four Herbie films are: The Love Bug, Herbie Rides Again, Herbie Goes to Monte Carlo, and Herbie Goes Bananas.
9. The Lion King is the highest-grossing film in Disney history.
10. Walt Disney was afraid of Mice.
11. Toy Story was the first animated film to be generated completely on computers.
12. When Pinocchio became a real boy, he had five fingers (instead of four) on each hand.
13. In France Chip and Dale are named Tic et Tac.
14. Dumbo is the only main character from a Disney full length feature animation who did not speak during the film.
15. Mickey Mouse’s ears are at an angle of exactly 106 degrees - the same as the hydrogen atoms in a water molecule. 
1. Countries that use a ‘pound’ for currency: Cyprus, Egypt, Lebanon, Syria, UK.
2. Adam Ant’s real name is Stuart Leslie Goddard.
3. Mercury and Venus have no known moons.
4. Car safety belts were first introduced in 1849 by Volvo .
5. James Ramsay Macdonald was the first prime minister to appoint a woman to the cabinet (Margaret Bondfield, 1929).
6. The first Top Of The Pops was presented by Jimmy Saville on 1 Jan, 1964.
7. The Simpsons live at 742 Evergreen Terrace.
8. The top four cities with the highest populations are Shanghai (13.3m), Mumbai (12.6m), Buenos Aires (11.9m), Moscow (11.2m). London (7.6m) is 18th.
9. Henry VIII is buried in St George’s Chapel, Windsor Castle, with Jane Seymour.
10. Manchester United have won the FA Cup the most times: 11.
11. Celtic have won the Scottish FA Cup the most times: 32.
12. There are only four words in the English language which end in"-dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.
13. Donald Duck’s middle name is Fauntleroy.
14. Onions were used by the Egyptians to replace the eyes removed from mummies.
15. UK Police ranks: Police Constable, Sergeant, Inspector, Chief Inspector, Superintendent, Chief Superintendent, Assistant Chief Constable, Deputy Chief Constable, Chief Constable.
Five Potato Songs
Million Dollar Bash - Bob Dylan
T-Bone - Neil Young
Hot Potatoes - The Kinks
Papa’s Got A Brand New Bag - James Brown
Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off - Louis Armstrong + Ella Fitzgerald
Five Lemon Songs
Country Pie - Bob Dylan
Everything In Its Right Place - Radiohead
Lemon - U2
Life Is A Lemon And I Want My Money Back - Meat Loaf
The Lemon Song - Led Zeppelin
Five Wine Songs
All Along The Watchtower - Bob Dylan
Norwegian Wood - The Beatles
Master Song - Leonard Cohen
Lilac Wine - Jeff Buckley
Body Movin’ - The Beastie Boys
This afternoon I sent off some year seven students with digital cameras - they were taking photos for leaflets they were making about the school. Most came back with photos of displays, the sportsfield, the trophy cabinet, the buildings, and students and teachers both in action and posing.
One pair took a little longer than the others - they had decided to snap the headteacher in his office. Brave boys. When I was that age, I would have been far too scared to undertake such a mission. One of them told me how impressed he was with the headteacher’s office: "It’s really amazing, especially the carpet - it’s like walking on air."
1. Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.
2. The names of Popeye’s four nephews are Pipeye, Peepeye, Pupeye, and Poopeye.
3. The first product to have a bar code was Wrigleys chewing gum.
4. Ghosts appear in four Shakespearian plays; Julius Caesar, Richard III, Hamlet and Macbeth.
5. The world’s first speed limit regulation was in England in 1903. It was 20 mph.
6. The four principal characters from the cartoon series "The Chipmunks" are Alvin, Simon, Theodore, and Dave.
7. Babies are born with 300 bones, but by adulthood we have only 206 in our bodies.
8. The plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.
9. The word "karate" means "empty hand".
10. There are 100 tiles in Scrabble.
11. Leicester City have been FA Cup finalists four times, and never won.
12. Moorgate and Baker Street both have ten patforms (the most on the London Underground) - although four of Moorgate’s are not used by London Underground trains.
13. Bock’s Car was the name of the B-29 Bomber that dropped the Atom Bomb on Nagasaki.
14. The three most common elements in the universe are 1) hydrogen; 2) helium; 3) oxygen.
15. Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backwards, and are on the Australian coat of arms for that reason.
What’s on television tonight? Anything good? Apart from Celebrity Big Brother, which sounds awful, there are a couple of other celebrity/reality shows worth missing. Who commissions these things?
Britain’s Favourite Celebrity Chav
Daniella Westbrook presents a countdown of the nation’s favourite Burberry-clad, bling-adorned personalities, delving into the world of chav culture with profiles of its heroes and zeroes, anti-fashion tips, and interviews with chav champions.
Vote for Me!
A week of programmes in search of someone who could stand as an independent candidate in a general election kicks off with 60 political hopefuls trying to convince Lorraine Kelly, John Sergeant and Kelvin Mackenzie that they have what it takes to be crowned the people’s champion. The final takes place on Friday.
There is a link on this website that I wanted to check at work (school) today. To my surprise the main index page was banned. After visiting the site archives, it transpired that yesterday’s was the offending post. I wonder what the offending word was that didn’t make it past the school’s filter: ramshackle? queer? electrocuted? Eustace?
I will let you know when I find out.
28 December, 2004 saw the inaugral post to my new personal website. The much loved mrpayne.com will continue here for the foreseeable future, but there came a time when I needed a slightly more anonymous outlet for my musings. So, rest assured dear readers (family, friends, colleagues, students, and others), you can continue to read this website without fear of offence or embarrassment. If anyone is desperate to visit my new site (and read my views on such diverse topics as Palestine, Ruth Kelly, Jerry Springer The Opera, and Psychic Phenoma), email me and I may oblige with a link. I will probably slip in a link to it at some point anyway.
I wrote two wonderful short stories during the Christmas holiday: The Ramshackle Clocktower Mystery and The Phoenix. I continue to work on my first novel, Duke. I sometimes find it difficult to write a convincing first line. I think of some memorable opening lines… Are they convincing?
"All children, except one, grow up."
"It was a queer, sultry summer, the summer they electrocuted the Rosenbergs, and I didn’t know what I was doing in New York."
"When a day that you happen to know is Wednesday starts off by sounding like Sunday, there is something seriously wrong somewhere."
"In my younger and more vulnerable years my father gave me some advice that I’ve been turning over in my mind ever since."
"There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it."
Happy New Year!
My favourite football team have had a good start to the year. Spurs won 5-2 against Everton on Saturday, and last night they beat Manchester United 1-0. No: they drew 0-0. Pedro Mendes’ glorious shot from the half-way line, crossed the line, and then was disallowed. Oh well. My sporting hopes for the year:
1. Spurs qualify for Europe
2. England win The Ashes
